Cara’s thought for the day…
When working with a wide network of professionals we sometimes need to consider their position. What you ask? consider what they are going through? The fact is that paperwork, necessary steps and networks are way more difficult than just a simple request. What looks simple to us the parent/carer simply may not be as simple as we think. Does this make the waiting and the confusion easier to take? No, likely it will still be frustrating. Does it make it right? No, I am not saying that the difficult system we work in is right.
There are now groups and Unions in place to help us make the changes needed and this post is not about them. What I am saying is that the people we are working with (social workers, therapists, managers, teachers, etc.) all have other expectations and regulations that they need to follow…many that we do not understand. I am not saying to stop asking for help or to stop trying…I am saying that considering what steps in reality may need to be made, can help you be a part of it and support those who may actually be trying to support your child.
Most of those who are doing those jobs are doing them because they want to help. There are those in every job who are ineffectual, but there are also those who are great at their job but are stuck in a system that is not built to help in the way you or your child need. I suggest that when things seem to be so difficult to ask questions.
See if there is some regulation or issue standing in the way of getting what is needed. Keep everything in writing, all conversations and requests. Do send out reminders (having a heavy caseload can make things hard to remember). Be patient, and take a breath. Look at the situation and see if it is a systematic issue or an issue that really is incompetence with the person you are trying to work with.
Once you do this you can then seek out the right answer for taking it further and moving things along. It may be that you need to complain about someone on your team, but it also may turn out that it was truly not their fault, that the system was in their way as much as it was in yours. These times are difficult and it is very easy to point a finger at the other person.
Know your complaints procedures for your agency, school and any system you are working within and use those complaint procedures to deal with your issue. There are also ways to escalate, so don’t give up thinking that your complaint didn’t work. Escalate if needed, but be ready to work and be a part of the fix if one is offered.
One other thought… you do not ever have to accept the excuse of “it just isn’t done like that”. You do get to ask “why” and take the steps needed to find out your answer. Don’t give up…this isn’t easy its true but it is valuable and very worthwhile for you and your children…those you are working with feel the same way…it is valuable and worthwhile…at least the good ones do and there really are many of them out there.