The Inner Working Model, what is it? What are the core beliefs that make us act like we do? Cara looks at these issues and and gives advice on what we can do to help the children in our care.
The Inner Working Model
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Morning Routines
With the start of school coming up, Cara talks about getting those morning routines right and how to set them up to work for you.
Thought for the Day
Thought for the day…When therapeutic parenting, also look for a medical reason for the behaviour. This is not about ADHD or mental health issues to search for, but about physical issues that can cause and or show up as behavioural issues.
Today I had the opportunity to discuss a parenting issue with a wonderful parent. They were concerned over a presenting behaviour. With the behaviour being new, I first asked about health issues and if they had seen the doctor. As we searched for answers, she did recall that their child had acid reflux and perhaps it could be the cause for the behaviour. My first suggestion was to first look into the physical needs of the child and see the doctor. Luckily she is a great Mom, and went searching for answers (we all need someone to bounce things off of sometimes).
There is of course a possibility that there is an emotional need or behaviour that needs dealt with, but first and foremost make sure there isn’t a medical reason.
Toileting issues can be caused by problems with infections or immature bladder. Problems with smearing can be created by issues with constipation. A child banging their head could be caused by head or tooth pain. Gagging and coughing can be caused by acid reflux.
When your child presents with a new behaviour, or their behaviour seems to all of a sudden become even more extreme, seek out a medical reason before assuming that something you are doing is no longer working, or that you are doing something wrong, especially if your child is younger and or non verbal.
Always stay calm, continue to use your therapeutic parenting to help our child, but first and foremost see if there is a medical reason for what is happening.
New or prospective Foster Carer Information #45
In this video, Cara talks about being a new Foster Carer or becoming a Foster Carer and the things you may have to face. Check out our other videos by subscribing to us on YouTube.
Social Worker visits during Covid #44
In this video Cara talks about the concerns Foster Carers have with visits from Social Workers during lock-down. She gives advice on what you can do and how to keep yourself safe.
Self Care during Covid #43
Cara talks about self care during our current Covid Lockdown and how we can look for the positives even though we can’t get out for a pamper. Check out our other videos by subscribing to us on YouTube. https://youtu.be/KrM-UTE1W4k
Thought for the day
Thought for the day…unexpected change is hard. Today is a snow day and so my children don’t have school as planned. During Covid routine has been even more important to them and to me. The little changes that they may have been able to handle before Covid, may be just too big for them to handle. So what do we do?
Up the nurture for your children, make sure to connect with them several times a day. Give extra treats, hugs and or gentle touches on the shoulder.
Up your self care, change being stressful on them means it is stressful on you. Take the time to sip a warm drink or play a silly game on your phone. Let the children watch a tv show so that you have a few minutes of peace and quiet.
Reflect on why they are doing what they are doing, is it their trauma and or disability talking? Are they able to calm down? Are they being triggered? What has worked in the past?
Don’t take it personally. When they are being grumpy, don’t take it on and think it is something you did wrong. Remember that right now they are not able to handle the change.
Communicate what they are feeling. Let them know that you understand why it is hard on them. They may argue, but remember that you do know them often even better than they do.
Even with changes, get in as much of a routine as you can. As an example, on a snow day we will go into the weekend routine. This is still a routine they understand and can help them get through the day.
Above all be easy on yourself! Remember that you are not alone and there really are many parents and children out there going through the same things…we are here to support one another so try not to go through this alone.
I hope you make it through your snow day or just a day that has not gone as expected. Stay safe out there!
Webinar on Nurturing & Replenishing Empathy
Free Webinar – Thursday 4th February – 4pm GMT
What the world needs now… Nurturing & replenishing empathy.
This webinar will help us think together about what empathy actually is, how it develops and how it can be helped to develop. Are hours spent online and working virtually having a negative effect on how we can attune to one another?
And what happens when our own empathy gets blocked? How can free we ourselves up again to empathise with our pupils and clients, carers and parents, our colleagues, our community and ourselves?
With Michele Crook, CEO of Babywatching UK, Tanya Wallis, Counsellor from Croydon Drop-In, and Dr Dan Hughes, Child & Adolescent Psychologist
Register here: https://www.coursewedo.com/webinars
Working with Schools
Cara Jones, lead trainer from Treehouse Therapeutic Training, talks about schools and how to have a better relationship with your child’s school. Check out our other videos by subscribing to our YouTube Chanel.